Very
Very
Simple
List
Today
VIDEOS THAT I HAVE UNNECESSARILY OVER-SENT 2009 in NO PARTICULAR ORDER
1) Guttersnipe from "Taboo"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0FgT_4LBzIo&NR=1
2) Christian Side Hug
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_Oj0-splZw&feature=related
3) Muppets "Danny Boy"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCbuRA_D3KU
4) "You are being Shagged by a Rare Parrot"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9T1vfsHYiKY
5) Rugby Hula
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cle20lQg0Qs&feature=related
6) PicnicFace- Liberty 45
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdbZOD_KTJE
7) Robogeisha Trailer
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wo-gGes6qig
8) Random Mitch Hedburg Sketch from the 90s
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HC5fYlFpxmo&feature=related
9) The Monty Python Sheep Sketch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vkw2DdoskPY
And of course
10) Sames and Opposites by Demetri Martin
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKLSgBSWwxQ
Why?
I don't know.
Happy New Year, may it be a damn sight better than the last.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
For Real, I am getting darned tired of these sporadic posts
Apologies, one and all, for Wednesday being delayed to Friday. I blame the holiday season.
This week's list is a set of my New Year's Resolutions, put into standard military coding to make them seem less pathetic. Brownie points to anyone who can guess what the originals are.
Double brownie points to anyone who posts their own
1’) Operation: Abort Food Baby.
2’) Operation: YELL
3’) Operation: Party it up in this bitch.
4’) Operation: Potty Mouth
5’) Operation: tick tick BOOM
6’) Operation: Fortes Fortuna Adiuvat
7’) Operation: Group Hug
8’) Operation: Drop Everything and Read
9’) Operation: Grocery Money
10’) Operation: OMG
11’) Operation: It’s Okay, Pluto, I’m Not a Planet Either.
This week's list is a set of my New Year's Resolutions, put into standard military coding to make them seem less pathetic. Brownie points to anyone who can guess what the originals are.
Double brownie points to anyone who posts their own
1’) Operation: Abort Food Baby.
2’) Operation: YELL
3’) Operation: Party it up in this bitch.
4’) Operation: Potty Mouth
5’) Operation: tick tick BOOM
6’) Operation: Fortes Fortuna Adiuvat
7’) Operation: Group Hug
8’) Operation: Drop Everything and Read
9’) Operation: Grocery Money
10’) Operation: OMG
11’) Operation: It’s Okay, Pluto, I’m Not a Planet Either.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Due to the Snow Day, Wednesday was postponed until Monday
As the semester and 2009 draw to a close, we'd like to take a more childish spin on the list.
Things to do on a snowy day, provided you don't have a metaphysics final or a job with the town of Hempstead
*Obnoxious snowball fight
*Ice skating
* Fall to the ground dramatically, pretending to have a heart attack and then making a snow angel
* Bake
* Cook
* Drink
* Curl up on the couch with a good book
* Curl up on the couch with a good bookie?
* Uno
*Cocoa
* Catch up on a favorite TV program
* Catch up on CSPAN
* Order free samples of Vagisil addressed to all your male friends' mailboxes
* Condom balloon animals
*Shadow puppets
* Paper snowflakes
Please feel free to add :-)
Things to do on a snowy day, provided you don't have a metaphysics final or a job with the town of Hempstead
*Obnoxious snowball fight
*Ice skating
* Fall to the ground dramatically, pretending to have a heart attack and then making a snow angel
* Bake
* Cook
* Drink
* Curl up on the couch with a good book
* Curl up on the couch with a good bookie?
* Uno
*Cocoa
* Catch up on a favorite TV program
* Catch up on CSPAN
* Order free samples of Vagisil addressed to all your male friends' mailboxes
* Condom balloon animals
*Shadow puppets
* Paper snowflakes
Please feel free to add :-)
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
LAST WEDNESDAY (for the semester... technically)
Hey kids
In honor of the last week of classes, this week's list is something everyone loves-- Shakespearean dirty jokes and insults!
(If you don't get why these are funny, let me know, I'll explain with gusto :-P )
By my life, this is my lady’s hand these be her very C’s, her U’s and her T’s and thus makes she her great P’s. It is, in contempt of question, her hand.- 12th Night II, ix
Well said: that was laid on with a trowel.- As You Like It I,ii
I do desire we may be better strangers.- As You Like It III, ii
The horn, the horn, the lusty horn,
Is not a thing to laugh to scorn.- As you like It IV, ii
How bravely thou becom'st thy bed, fresh lily.- Cymbeline II, ii
I know a trick worth two of that.- Henry IV- 1, II, i
I’ll tickle your catastrophe.- Henry IV-2, II,i
Self-love, my liege, is not so vile a sin, as self-neglecting.- Henry V, II, iv
And sheath'd their swords for lack of argument.- Henry V, III,i
The smallest worm will turn, being trodden on.- Henry VI, II,ii
So may he rest; his faults lie gently on him!- Henry VIII, IV,ii
Nothing will come of nothing: speak again.- King Lear I,i
Infirm of purpose!
Give me the daggers. The sleeping and the dead
Are but as pictures. 'Tis the eye of childhood
That fears a painted devil. - Macbeth II,i
Masters, spread yourselves.- Midsummer Night's Dream I,ii
Nay, faith, let me not play a woman; I have a beard coming- Midsummer Night's Dream I,ii
A lion among ladies, is a most dreadful thing.- Midsummer Night's Dream III,i
He is sooner caught than the pestilence, and the taker runs presently mad. God help the noble Claudio! if he have caught the Benedick, it will cost him a thousand pound ere he be cured.- Much Ado About Nothing I,i
I would my horse had the speed of your tongue, and so good a continuer.- Much Ado About Nothing I,i
I do love nothing in the world so well as you: is not that strange?- Much Ado About Nothing IV,i
Your daughter and the Moor are now making the beast with two backs.- Othello I,i
Villain, be sure thou prove my love a whore,- Othello III,iii
Was ever woman in this humour woo'd?
Was ever woman in this humour won?
I'll have her; — but I will not keep her long.- Richard III, I,ii
I do bite my thumb, sir- Romeo & Juliet I,i
If love be rough with you, be rough with love;
Prick love for pricking, and you beat love down- Romeo & Juliet I, iv
THE ENTIRETY OF THE TAMING OF THE SHREW, ACT II
Villian, I have done thy mother- Titus Andronicus IV,ii
AND OF COURSE
HAMLET
Lady, shall I lie in your lap?
OPHELIA
No, my lord.
HAMLET
I mean, my head upon your lap?
OPHELIA
Ay, my lord.
HAMLET
Do you think I meant country matters?
OPHELIA
I think nothing, my lord.
HAMLET
That's a fair thought to lie between maids' legs.
OPHELIA
What is, my lord?
HAMLET
Nothing.
In honor of the last week of classes, this week's list is something everyone loves-- Shakespearean dirty jokes and insults!
(If you don't get why these are funny, let me know, I'll explain with gusto :-P )
By my life, this is my lady’s hand these be her very C’s, her U’s and her T’s and thus makes she her great P’s. It is, in contempt of question, her hand.- 12th Night II, ix
Well said: that was laid on with a trowel.- As You Like It I,ii
I do desire we may be better strangers.- As You Like It III, ii
The horn, the horn, the lusty horn,
Is not a thing to laugh to scorn.- As you like It IV, ii
How bravely thou becom'st thy bed, fresh lily.- Cymbeline II, ii
I know a trick worth two of that.- Henry IV- 1, II, i
I’ll tickle your catastrophe.- Henry IV-2, II,i
Self-love, my liege, is not so vile a sin, as self-neglecting.- Henry V, II, iv
And sheath'd their swords for lack of argument.- Henry V, III,i
The smallest worm will turn, being trodden on.- Henry VI, II,ii
So may he rest; his faults lie gently on him!- Henry VIII, IV,ii
Nothing will come of nothing: speak again.- King Lear I,i
Infirm of purpose!
Give me the daggers. The sleeping and the dead
Are but as pictures. 'Tis the eye of childhood
That fears a painted devil. - Macbeth II,i
Masters, spread yourselves.- Midsummer Night's Dream I,ii
Nay, faith, let me not play a woman; I have a beard coming- Midsummer Night's Dream I,ii
A lion among ladies, is a most dreadful thing.- Midsummer Night's Dream III,i
He is sooner caught than the pestilence, and the taker runs presently mad. God help the noble Claudio! if he have caught the Benedick, it will cost him a thousand pound ere he be cured.- Much Ado About Nothing I,i
I would my horse had the speed of your tongue, and so good a continuer.- Much Ado About Nothing I,i
I do love nothing in the world so well as you: is not that strange?- Much Ado About Nothing IV,i
Your daughter and the Moor are now making the beast with two backs.- Othello I,i
Villain, be sure thou prove my love a whore,- Othello III,iii
Was ever woman in this humour woo'd?
Was ever woman in this humour won?
I'll have her; — but I will not keep her long.- Richard III, I,ii
I do bite my thumb, sir- Romeo & Juliet I,i
If love be rough with you, be rough with love;
Prick love for pricking, and you beat love down- Romeo & Juliet I, iv
THE ENTIRETY OF THE TAMING OF THE SHREW, ACT II
Villian, I have done thy mother- Titus Andronicus IV,ii
AND OF COURSE
HAMLET
Lady, shall I lie in your lap?
OPHELIA
No, my lord.
HAMLET
I mean, my head upon your lap?
OPHELIA
Ay, my lord.
HAMLET
Do you think I meant country matters?
OPHELIA
I think nothing, my lord.
HAMLET
That's a fair thought to lie between maids' legs.
OPHELIA
What is, my lord?
HAMLET
Nothing.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Damn Jelly Beans....
That had nothing to do with this week's list.
Recently, one of our agents had a life-changing experience involving everyone's favorite part of speech, gerunds.
So, here are our top ten favorite gerunds, in no particular order.
1) Sexing
2) Eating
3) Laughing
4) Sneezing
5) Spelunking
6) Exacerbating
7) Joking
8) Watching/ Viewing
9) Observing
10) Canada Attacking
Recently, one of our agents had a life-changing experience involving everyone's favorite part of speech, gerunds.
So, here are our top ten favorite gerunds, in no particular order.
1) Sexing
2) Eating
3) Laughing
4) Sneezing
5) Spelunking
6) Exacerbating
7) Joking
8) Watching/ Viewing
9) Observing
10) Canada Attacking
Thursday, November 26, 2009
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!
Here is what those of us here at Freudian Slip Films are thankful for (In no particular order):
1. love
2. google, gmail, blogger, facebook, free google websites
3. cozy pair of socks
4. laughter
5. comedy
6. happiness/joy
7. family
8. friends
9. days off from school.
10. Williams Shakespeare
11. good music
12. art
13. detective muffins.
14. memories
15. hopes
16. hot cup of tea
17. cool side of the pillow
18. the G train (It could be worse, you know)
19. good books
20. the smell of fresh baked goods
21. holidays
22. Sigmund Freud ;)
23. British Comedy
24. Majesty Snowbird and the likes
25. A hug
26. the fact that we are lucky enough to not go hungry
27. the fact that we are lucky enough to have a place to live
28. the fact that we have clothes to wear
29. our health
30. those little moments that make life excellent
31. Jane Austen
32. MLIA
33. free education :D
34. Bob Fosse
35. Ambulances
36. our pets
37. toothpaste
38. our flip video cameras
39. our laptops
40. (This was put last for effect) The people out there who agreed to fan out page...we love you and appreciate your support. With everything we do through Freudian Slip Films, we hope to bring at least a smile to your face (hopefully a chuckle, a giggle, a laugh etc.) Have a most excellent holiday everyone!
1. love
2. google, gmail, blogger, facebook, free google websites
3. cozy pair of socks
4. laughter
5. comedy
6. happiness/joy
7. family
8. friends
9. days off from school.
10. Williams Shakespeare
11. good music
12. art
13. detective muffins.
14. memories
15. hopes
16. hot cup of tea
17. cool side of the pillow
18. the G train (It could be worse, you know)
19. good books
20. the smell of fresh baked goods
21. holidays
22. Sigmund Freud ;)
23. British Comedy
24. Majesty Snowbird and the likes
25. A hug
26. the fact that we are lucky enough to not go hungry
27. the fact that we are lucky enough to have a place to live
28. the fact that we have clothes to wear
29. our health
30. those little moments that make life excellent
31. Jane Austen
32. MLIA
33. free education :D
34. Bob Fosse
35. Ambulances
36. our pets
37. toothpaste
38. our flip video cameras
39. our laptops
40. (This was put last for effect) The people out there who agreed to fan out page...we love you and appreciate your support. With everything we do through Freudian Slip Films, we hope to bring at least a smile to your face (hopefully a chuckle, a giggle, a laugh etc.) Have a most excellent holiday everyone!
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
It's Wednesday
Hey everyone!
Our usual "It's Wednesday" list writer has been (forcefully) given a well-deserved day off.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and we will be adding a special Thanksgiving post. In the meantime, as it is Wednesday, I'd like to present the following three lists...The first is entitled "The Opposite of the 'I'm Thankful for...' List", the second "How to Kill a Relationship", the third "Things to Make You Laugh and Survive the Holidays."
(PS feel free to add anything in the comments on this post, and it will be edited in before next week).
The opposite of the "I'm Thankful for..." list
-The G Train
-When you sneeze inwardly
-When your seat on the subway is warm
-When your pillow is too warm, but you are too tired to flip it to the other side.
-When your arms get caught as you are trying to take off your jacket
-When it decides to rain every time you wear a new/nice pair of shoes.
-When the best laid plans run awry.
-When some food produce expires that you were planning to eat that day for lunch.
-When you just miss the bus, and it pulls away slowly, mocking you.
-When a seat opens on the train, just as you reach your stop.
-When your battery dies half-way through a boring class.
-When Rachelle tickles you, and Natalia talks about pajamas in the middle of class.
-People who double-dip.
-The smell of burnt crayons follows you near the lounge.
-Global warming.
-When people are insensitive.
-War.
-Hunger.
-Cheese in a can.
-Mushrooms
-When your socks have a hole at the toe
-When your socks have a hole at the heel
-When your shoes get wet and start to smell
-When you think there is an extra/less step in the staircase.
-When you trip on uneven sidewalk and people see you stumble.
-Seafood.
-Anger
-Hatred
-Violence
-Paper cuts
How to kill a relationship:
1. Write poetry
In the words of Elizabeth Bennet:
“And that put paid to it. I wonder who first discovered the power of poetry in driving away love? …Of a fine stout love, it may [be the food of love]. But if it is only a vague inclination I'm convinced one poor sonnet will kill it stone dead.”
2. Act like Edward Cullen (and if this doesn't end the relationship, it wasn't one worth being in)
3. Wear a snuggie in public•
4. Not bathing/bad hygiene (We all love hippies, but come on, man, it's 2009!)
5. Poison/hurt pet/plant of significant other
6. Ridicule person's identity of self*
7. Physical violence*
8. Threatening significant other (for example, google Maffia and maffia related behavior)*
9. Poisoning significant other*
10. (see "Opposite of 'I am thankful for...'" list)
11. Leave girlfriend for pregnant ex-girlfriend/Get pregnant by ex-boyfriend and leave current boyfriend.
12. Twilight• (see no. 2.)
13. Be into obnoxious music
14. Act like Bella from Twilight (although I hate adding Twilight to a list more than once, I think this applies) (see no. 2, 12)
15A. Propose marriage too soon....or in a terrible way
15B. Act like Mr. Collins (from Pride and Prejudice)•.
16. Tell significant other you are actually into the other sex (ie...in a heterosexual relationship, pretend to/actually be homosexual, and in a homosexual relationship, pretend to/actually be heterosexual).
17. Tell significant other you are actually an alien•
18. Admit to being a Scientologist (only works if you and your significant others are not Scientologists).
19. Tell significant other he/she reminds you of your mother (in a Freudian kind of way)•
20. Tell significant other you are interested in his/her mother/father (in a non-platonic way)•
--------
* Note, will not work if person is masochistic
• May not work with everyone, some people are actually into these things...consider this carefully before taking this action...
---------------
Things to make you laugh and survive the holidays (or any other time you need a laugh)
Brian Regan:
I can't remember names... And I always try to do the nickname thing, to get out of it. Everybody knows what you're trying to pull, you know?
"Heeeeey... buckaroo."
"My name's not buckaroo."
"Sure, sure it is... partner"
Some people get really upset if you say their name wrong, especially if they have a name that's similar to another name. Carolyn and Caroline. They got a thing about that, man. Don't get that wrong, 'cause they're gonna drill you. "Hi, Caro... lyn."
"It's Caroline. It's Caroline, Brian..."
"It's BRIOOOOHHHN. Yes, my name is BRIOOOOOOGGHHN!!! It's very hard to say my name correctly, 'cuz my name is BRANNAAGHAMMANGAAH!!! Can you say that? Very few can. Correctly."
quotes: http://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/98398.Brian_Regan
Demetri Martin:
“I like parties, but I don’t like piñatas because the pinata promotes violence against flamboyant animals. Hey, there’s a donkey with some pizzazz. Let’s kick its ass. What I’m trying to say is, don’t make the same Halloween costume mistake that I did.”
quotes: http://captainpinhead.wordpress.com/2006/10/01/demetri-martin-quotes/
Monty Python:“Your highness, when I said that you are like a stream of bat's piss, I only mean that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark”
quotes: http://thinkexist.com/quotes/monty_python/
Dylan Moran: I think that women just have a primeval instinct to make soup, which they will try to foist on anybody who looks like a likely candidate.
quotes: http://www.icelebz.com/quotes/dylan_moran/
also check out: Animaniacs
Our usual "It's Wednesday" list writer has been (forcefully) given a well-deserved day off.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and we will be adding a special Thanksgiving post. In the meantime, as it is Wednesday, I'd like to present the following three lists...The first is entitled "The Opposite of the 'I'm Thankful for...' List", the second "How to Kill a Relationship", the third "Things to Make You Laugh and Survive the Holidays."
(PS feel free to add anything in the comments on this post, and it will be edited in before next week).
The opposite of the "I'm Thankful for..." list
-The G Train
-When you sneeze inwardly
-When your seat on the subway is warm
-When your pillow is too warm, but you are too tired to flip it to the other side.
-When your arms get caught as you are trying to take off your jacket
-When it decides to rain every time you wear a new/nice pair of shoes.
-When the best laid plans run awry.
-When some food produce expires that you were planning to eat that day for lunch.
-When you just miss the bus, and it pulls away slowly, mocking you.
-When a seat opens on the train, just as you reach your stop.
-When your battery dies half-way through a boring class.
-When Rachelle tickles you, and Natalia talks about pajamas in the middle of class.
-People who double-dip.
-The smell of burnt crayons follows you near the lounge.
-Global warming.
-When people are insensitive.
-War.
-Hunger.
-Cheese in a can.
-Mushrooms
-When your socks have a hole at the toe
-When your socks have a hole at the heel
-When your shoes get wet and start to smell
-When you think there is an extra/less step in the staircase.
-When you trip on uneven sidewalk and people see you stumble.
-Seafood.
-Anger
-Hatred
-Violence
-Paper cuts
How to kill a relationship:
1. Write poetry
In the words of Elizabeth Bennet:
“And that put paid to it. I wonder who first discovered the power of poetry in driving away love? …Of a fine stout love, it may [be the food of love]. But if it is only a vague inclination I'm convinced one poor sonnet will kill it stone dead.”
2. Act like Edward Cullen (and if this doesn't end the relationship, it wasn't one worth being in)
3. Wear a snuggie in public•
4. Not bathing/bad hygiene (We all love hippies, but come on, man, it's 2009!)
5. Poison/hurt pet/plant of significant other
6. Ridicule person's identity of self*
7. Physical violence*
8. Threatening significant other (for example, google Maffia and maffia related behavior)*
9. Poisoning significant other*
10. (see "Opposite of 'I am thankful for...'" list)
11. Leave girlfriend for pregnant ex-girlfriend/Get pregnant by ex-boyfriend and leave current boyfriend.
12. Twilight• (see no. 2.)
13. Be into obnoxious music
14. Act like Bella from Twilight (although I hate adding Twilight to a list more than once, I think this applies) (see no. 2, 12)
15A. Propose marriage too soon....or in a terrible way
15B. Act like Mr. Collins (from Pride and Prejudice)•.
16. Tell significant other you are actually into the other sex (ie...in a heterosexual relationship, pretend to/actually be homosexual, and in a homosexual relationship, pretend to/actually be heterosexual).
17. Tell significant other you are actually an alien•
18. Admit to being a Scientologist (only works if you and your significant others are not Scientologists).
19. Tell significant other he/she reminds you of your mother (in a Freudian kind of way)•
20. Tell significant other you are interested in his/her mother/father (in a non-platonic way)•
--------
* Note, will not work if person is masochistic
• May not work with everyone, some people are actually into these things...consider this carefully before taking this action...
---------------
Things to make you laugh and survive the holidays (or any other time you need a laugh)
Brian Regan:
I can't remember names... And I always try to do the nickname thing, to get out of it. Everybody knows what you're trying to pull, you know?
"Heeeeey... buckaroo."
"My name's not buckaroo."
"Sure, sure it is... partner"
Some people get really upset if you say their name wrong, especially if they have a name that's similar to another name. Carolyn and Caroline. They got a thing about that, man. Don't get that wrong, 'cause they're gonna drill you. "Hi, Caro... lyn."
"It's Caroline. It's Caroline, Brian..."
"It's BRIOOOOHHHN. Yes, my name is BRIOOOOOOGGHHN!!! It's very hard to say my name correctly, 'cuz my name is BRANNAAGHAMMANGAAH!!! Can you say that? Very few can. Correctly."
quotes: http://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/98398.Brian_Regan
Demetri Martin:
“I like parties, but I don’t like piñatas because the pinata promotes violence against flamboyant animals. Hey, there’s a donkey with some pizzazz. Let’s kick its ass. What I’m trying to say is, don’t make the same Halloween costume mistake that I did.”
quotes: http://captainpinhead.wordpress.com/2006/10/01/demetri-martin-quotes/
Monty Python:“Your highness, when I said that you are like a stream of bat's piss, I only mean that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark”
quotes: http://thinkexist.com/quotes/monty_python/
Dylan Moran: I think that women just have a primeval instinct to make soup, which they will try to foist on anybody who looks like a likely candidate.
quotes: http://www.icelebz.com/quotes/dylan_moran/
also check out: Animaniacs
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